One of worst things about chronic illnesses, I find, is the unpredictable effect it has on your mood.
Without realising it or knowing why, it can make you short tempered and snappy with those around you; those you love. You end up saying things that you don’t really mean and later regret but alas, by then the damage is done and you have fucked up what was shaping up to be a perfectly good day.
You have hurt the ones that you treasure most in life, simply because they were in the wrong place at the wrong time.
You know this; you can see it happening right there in front of you but feel powerless to stop it which in turn makes you angry and frustrated and before very long you find yourself on the all-too-familiar helter-skelter of emotion with a one-way ticket to the depths of despair accompanied by an overwhelming urge to either sob your heart out or scream in rage at the universe for putting you in that position, (or both).
What can you do?
What can you say?
21st February 2015